Well latte duh, latte duh.

For most of humanity’s existence, our kind have worried about getting enough to eat. So we may see it as a good sign that now some of our species are worried about not getting organic milk in their lattes and frappes. “Where oh where shall I ever find a frappe made with organic milk?” one supposes they say. “If only Starbucks made their lattes and frappes with organic milk; it would be so healthy!”

Or as one over-achieving Organitrepreneur put it:

“Consumers are increasingly looking for organic milk. I stopped drinking Starbucks lattes once I found out the health implications of consuming non-organic milk.Vani Hari, creator of FoodBabe.com.

Caffeine

Though its advantage is far from clear, for the sake of argument, let’s say that organic milk is healthier than conventionally produced milk.

Putting organic milk in coffee is akin to putting lipstick on a sow: the pig is still ugly (and with lipstick, quite silly looking) and the coffee is still full of (natural) chemicals with long and complicated names that should scare the mocha off any chemophobe’s lips.

As I have written before, every day I make coffee, a phenol-laced solution, for my wife and myself. It has “826 volatile chemical substances, 16 of which are known by the state of California to cause cancer.” One cup of this hot, and astoundingly delicious, pick-me-up contains at least 10 milligrams of known carcinogens. Here’s a partial list of the stuff we put in our bodies: caffeic acid, 1,2-dihydroxybenzene, furfural (a heterocyclic aldehyde), benzene-1,4-diol, acrylamide, hydrogen peroxide, 5-caffeoylquinic acid, 3-caffeoylquinic-1,5-lactone, and the all-important 1,3,7-Trimethyl-3,7-dihydro-1H-purine-2,6-dione (caffeine).

If you’re someone who says that you won’t put anything in your mouth that you can’t pronounce, put down that cup. But if you’re someone who knows that dose makes the poison, well, bon appétit!

For more on coffee, its chemistry and physiological effects see the Royal Society of Chemistry’s, “Chemistry in every cup.”